Meet Nick!

Born and raised in Toronto, I graduated from university of Toronto in Architectural Design, Visual Studies, and Art History in June 2020. I have spent much of my life battling several mental illness and coping through means of art and the creative process, however, I feel comfortable saying that I have truly been developing a proper sense of self within these past three years. Through the discovery and practices of Paganism, Wicca, and Spirituality, it not only has been something that has been helping me understand myself and the wounds that I have, but it has also driven me towards continuously developing techniques of mindfulness in order to combat moments where my inner self becomes a storm. 

In the time that I have been developing myself as an individual, one thing I have a have always continued to do was to hold strength in the truth of my identity of being a Gay Middle Eastern man in a North American, Westernized society. I spend much of my time building awareness around present day social issues in order to advocate strongly and passionately for the rights and equity of BIPOC individuals, LGBTQIA+, and social justice. 

I have joined the HAUS OF HAIRROR family in July 2021 in order to utilize my voice to share an experience that could be felt and understood, to preach for mental health wellness, and to speak about the intersectionality of where mental health, queer issues, and being a person of colour all come to intersect.I believe that recovery is never linear. For as much as we all wish we had a very clear upward trajectory towards the clouds from being so low in the dirt, it unfortunately is a wobbly road trying to figure out what works best for each individual. 

The concept of recovery was always a rather strange thing for me. Growing up, while having ever mental health issues, it never occurred to me that something like that can be helped or mitigated. I always though that it would be a balanced storm of one mental illness tipping the scale of another. 

In my teens, I was diagnosed with Depression, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, OCD, Social Anxiety, and Insomnia. All of which I already knew I had. And now with many many year between the initial diagnosis, it’s interesting to see where I’ve come, but also, to acknowledge what else has been present with me. 

In the time of the pandemic and the last two years, I have been coming to terms with a developing eating disorder. For a while, it’s gone left unchecked because I didn’t believe I had one. I compared my knowledge of eating disorders to what other around were experiencing, and the treatments they needed to receive, on top of an already a skewed understanding of what they were based off of what the media has shown and popularized as an image of the typical “stick thin girl.” I didn’t even think it was possible to have an eating disorder as a male. 

Now, it is something that is part of my life that I always have to be present in understanding. And it all started by acknowledging by and saying it out loud. 

I believe that I am in a constant state of flux, and that comes with my recovery journey. And that is where I am comfortably am right now. And you’ll get to hear from me, and underhand my story bit by bit. 

I look forward to sharing with you and even hearing from you. 

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